Archive for the 'Cinema/Television' Category

The Strangers, in theatres now!


June 9, 2008
Secret Owl

Cinema/Television

strangers-poster-tiny.jpg

The Strangers! It’s out now! In theatres! If you have trouble sleeping, you need to see this, stat! I had a nice nap during this “terrifying” movie.

I’m not sure what’s wrong with people these days. Quite possibly, the ten million dollar budget for this movie went completely towards paying bloggers to write good reviews. Because I can’t really see anything else they could have used it for.

Basically, the plot is this: there isn’t one! Oh hey, it’s a couple at some house in some place! Lookie there! Oh, wow! They get killed by three people in masks, with no motive or anything! None at all! I assumed they were going to live in the house, or fucking something, but nope! They just felt like killing some people. For kicks, I guess.

Of course, though, because the movie is an hour long, they can’t have the people die too quickly! First we have boring, awkward scenes with the couple. Not talking, just sitting around and doing normal shit in an irritating way. And then! My god, a girl is knocking on the door! TERROR.

From there, the rest of the movie is nothing but blurry shots of absolutely nothing. Every character in this movie walks around at snail-speed, as if the director is standing behind them the entire time, motioning “NO! SLOWER! WE’RE ONLY TEN MINUTES INTO THE MOVIE!”

There’s very little dialogue between the characters, and the most noise you’re going to hear is Liv Tyler crying/screaming at absolutely nothing, or creepy noises (that will eventually give you a headache). There’s no action. There’s no artistic value in this movie, no interesting shots or panoramas or anything.

Everything about this movie is terrible. This is easily the worst movie I’ve ever seen. Just…damn. And shame on those bloggers that’ve given this a good review.

I hate everyone.

The Fall


June 2, 2008
jameseric

Cinema/Television

For the majority of 2008, I had been waiting to see a movie that makes me lose my shit. A couple of them came very close. I can fully acknowledge my absolute adoration for Michel Gondry’s 3rd masterpiece in a row, Be Kind Rewind, as well as David Gordon Green’s 2nd best film to date, Snow Angels. But there is serious bias there since those are two of my favorite directors working today and I expected their films to rock my socks off. Although I certainly enjoyed watching both Iron Man and Indiana Jones, neither will be re-watched or deconstructed upon further viewing. They sat well with me, I digested them just fine, but I do have a preference to the types of films that I call ‘favorites.’ I have no qualms with leaving my IQ at the door, and relishing in good old-fashioned summer escapist entertainment like the two titles mentioned previous, but I also wasn’t thinking about them after I walked out of the theater other than acknowledging the impeccable chase sequences and the otherworldly charisma of Robert Downey, Jr. This year’s been tough on me, or I’ve been tough on it when it comes to my 2nd love, the cinema.

So out of the blue comes this movie called The Fall. Now, once again, I don’t expect most peeps to get behind me on this one and declare it one of the year’s best films the way I am. It’s a pretentious arthouse film that doesn’t have peppy one-liners or CGI monkeys helping Shia LeBouf get that crystal skull. It’s flawed for certain, but no film this year intoxicated me and left me breathless the way this one did. It’s more of a visual experience rather than an emotional one, but that’s the beauty of watching movies. Directors like Cronenberg and Tarantino can hit on all levels, but more often than not, there are individual facets of a film that move me so much, that I forgive the glaring flaws. I am incredibly moved by the language of David Mamet movies, despite the fact that the acting is stilted (why does he keep casting his wife?) and the direction is unspectacular (the final scenes of Redbelt were horribly constructed). Sometimes I’ll see a movie that is so fiercely manipulative, but because the acting is stellar, I love it nonetheless. The Fall falls under a category where I fell in love with its imagination, rather than the story or screenplay.

Essentially, it plays almost like a twisted version of The Princess Bride crossbred with Pan’s Labyrinth, despite not quite being as memorable as either of those influences. The thing about The Fall is the backstory. The director, Tarsem, spent eight years making this thing, and filmed on location in obscured places all across the world. Also, he allowed the majority of the scenes featuring a child actor, to be improvised, allowing the story to unfold through the child’s perspective. (Robert Rodriguez failed miserably at doing something similar by letting his kids help compose a screenplay with The Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava-Girl). The movie’s story revolves around Roy Walker, a bedridden stuntman in a hospital who befriends a fellow patient, a portly and curious young girl called Alexandria. To occupy the time and to manipulate her to his own advantage, he weaves a vivid, fantastical story of exotic lands. He conjures up a group of five heroes: an Indian, an ex-slave, an explosive expert, a masked bandit and, in a bit of revisionist history, famed evolutionary biologist Charles Darwin. They unite to fight a common enemy, Governor Odious, who has banished them all and caused them serious strife. Interspersed with the tale he tells, is the reality both of them face. Her traumatic childhood featuring a farmer father who dealt with opposing forces, and Roy’s own enemy, the man who took his true love away from him.

But there’s something that snuck up on me towards the end of this movie. I became emotionally involved in the characters, despite the characters themselves not becoming fully fleshed out. The story world and the real world don’t always interconnect flawlessly, but that’s due to the fact that neither of its creators are masterful at constructing a consistent narrative. Plus one of them is doped up most of the time on morphine. There’s a scene towards the end where Roy divulges to Alexandria, his reasons for befriending her, that tore me up inside. I think it was just the fact that both characters wanted to escape inside the fantasy they’d made together in storyland so badly, rather than deal with their pasts and the harsh reality they both continue to face. The ending itself mirrors Be Kind Rewind in a collective appreciation of artistic expression itself.

Roger Ebert calls The Fall, “a celebration of the imagination” and I couldn’t agree more. For a guy who loves equally the work of David Lynch and Terry Gilliam, this struck a happy balance between the worlds that those directors create in a way that is harmonious. If you take away the story, then at the very least, you have frame after frame of astonishing cinematography to the point where you go ‘how the fuck did they do that?’ Tarsem has made one other film, in which style suffocated the substance to the point where it became unbearable to watch. It was essentially The Silence of The Lambs meets a bad Freddy Krueger sequel, and that’s not a complement. The Cell, featured J-Lo running around in loose clothes as a psychiatrist (!) that infiltrates people’s dreams to help them deal with schizophrenia and/or post-traumatic stress. Low and behold, she must enter the mind of a serial killer (there’s the tagline right there). For those who have not seen the movie, Dreamscape, it’s safe to say that I’m shocked that Tarsem didn’t get sued for copyright infringement. Dreamscape, being the better film, albeit very dated. But let’s not dismiss Tarsem on the basis of his debut, because his follow-up is anything but a sophomore slump. It’s one of those rare experiences that makes the outside world seem new and fresh again, not unlike the time I walked out of seeing Terrence Malick’s The New World a couple years back. I know most folks won’t feel the same way, saying that once again, Tarsem is a director of style and very little substance. Personally, I think he’s made an incredible step-up from making a bland and repulsive serial killer movie to The Fall, which is uplifting, gorgeous, and makes you fall in love with the moviegoing experience all over again. What can you say about a movie that features swimming elephants, an island of pristine white sand in the middle of a sparkling ocean and a massive labyrinth of gold? This is the Land of Oz told through the eyes of a visionary, and it’s a little bit more accessible than David Lynch’s take on the fairytale (with his 2nd best film, Wild at Heart). Time will tell if Tarsem is going to shake the foundations with audiences, and I’m almost certain The Fall will not be a mainstream success, but that shouldn’t deter you from running to the nearest multiplex to seek it out. Who needs hallucinogens when there are movies like these? Did I mention that it’s produced / presented by David Fincher and Spike Jonze?

semisonic - gone to the movies

On TGIF, Miller-Boyett, and Boy Meets World


March 11, 2008
Patrick Ripoll

Cinema/Television WTF

For a while there TGIF was ruled under the iron fist of Thomas Miller and Robert Boyett. Miller-Boyett first hit it big with Happy Days, a show that I want to hate, but can’t because of how much it contributed to American culture. It contributed Ron Howard, who’d go on to narrate amazing television shows and direct utterly mediocre films. It gave us Weezer’s best music video. It gave us the term “Jump the shark”. Most of all, it gave us the Happy Days theme song, finally making the days of the week fun again.

After Happy Days, they had a couple more hits in the 80’s with Bosom Buddies and Perfect Strangers. But I was hardly alive in the 80’s, so fuck those shows. To me the golden age of Miller Boyett was in the early to mid 90’s with TGIF. They hit it big with Full House, a conservative television show about three men living together in San Fransisco. Oh irony. That show was super boring, but it was followed by Miller-Boyett’s masterpiece, Family Matters.

Days go by...

Family Matters is a spin-off of both Perfect Strangers and Die Hard. So shit was destined to be weird from the get go. It was groundbreaking from the start, setting a record for ugliest cast ever in an American sitcom. Harriet looked like Mrs. Huxtable, except a few steps to the left on the evolutionary charts. Not that Carl minded. I’m not saying Reginald Veljohnson is gay, but according to IMDB, he enjoys “singing and dancing in his spare time.” Imagine Carl Winslow singing and dancing through his house and tell me that wouldn’t be the gayest shit you’ve ever seen. But Family Matter’s greatest achievement was it’s spectacular descent into utter lunacy. From cloning to the Nutty Professor inspired “Stephan” to rocket packs to time machines to goddamned evil ventriloquist dummy versions of Carl and Steve, the show spun out of control in a completely glorious way. And don’t get me started on that theme song. Christ, that was a great theme song. I always tear up at “it’s the bigger love of the faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamily”, without fail.

Miller-Boyett hit it’s peak with Family Matters, but as quickly as they rose, they fell even faster with the abysmal Step-by-Step. I imagine the pitch for Step-by-Step went something like “what if all the characters in The Brady Bunch were trashy and unlikable?” I feel sorry for those kids. They had Patrick Duffy and Suzanne Somers as parents. JT, Dana, Al, Karen, Mark and the ever personality-deficient Brendan had no choice but to end up awful people. That shit’s genetic, my friend. But the worst offense the show committed was trying to stuff it’s own brand of Urkel down viewers throats: Cody. Code-man. Dude! Ch-yeah! Danaburger! He combined annoying catchphrase-ism with an annoying voice and a uncontrollable lust for his cousin, Dana. Dude could kickbox though, I’ll grant him that.

Sasha: Annoying but deadly.

As Step-By-Step destroyed Miller-Boyett productions (not to mention Lorimar productions), another show took the proud torch of TGIF and held it high. That show was Boy Meets World. Boy Meets World is the greatest television show in the history of televison shows. What makes it particularly special to me is that it was one of the first shows to allow it’s characters to age. Hell, that was the focal point of the show. Shawn and Cory are now in high school! Cory is now dating Topanga! They’re going to college! Cory and Topanga are getting married and making everyone uncomfortable by constantly making jokes about fucking! That shit was groundbreaking.

Speaking of groundbreaking, Boy Meets World featured a casual interracial relationship between the characters of Shawn and Angela. The best part about it was that it was never the focus of a show, never a big deal to anyone, and they never tried to play it up, even for an easy “you so white!” joke. It was just a pretty white guy and pretty black girl getting together. And that’s beautiful! Angela wasn’t the stereotypical African-American woman you normally see on television. She never snapped her fingers and said “no you di-in’t!”. As far as I know, she hates Koolaid. In fact, now that I think about it, she was a pretty boring character. No real personality at all. Is that more or less progressive than a stereotypical sassy black woman? If she was a teenaged Jackée, would that be better or worse? These are questions I’m not qualified to answer, but I am fully-qualified to say I’d tap that. I’d tap Topanga too, though, cuz I like a little meat on the bones. My father always said that an hourglass was better than an egg timer. Then he’d beat me. But above all I’d tap Jack and Eric’s roommate Rachel.

She put the I in TGIF. Don't ask what it means, it doesn't actually make sense.

Goddamn, Rachel was a dream. That redheaded Goddess may have been a thinly veiled excuse for eye-candy, but boy was she FUN! Did you see how bright red her hair is? That’s really bright! How FUN! What a perfect counterpart to the wackiness that is latter-day Eric Matthews. Eric’s transformation was much like Family Matters, going more and more bizarre til it began to bend the very reality of the show. I think at one point he was a caveman who talked to squirrels. Thank God they had William Daniels to lend the show his gravitas. Mention Mr. Feeny to anyone age 16 to 21, and they will at least smile. They may even hug you. It’s like a 90’s youth fraternity. The same way previous generations were linked by their experiences in Vietnam, kids of the 90’s are united by their common love of watching Shawn yell “it’s because I LIVE IN A TRAILER, isn’t it?”, run his fingers through his hair, and storm out the Mathew’s kitchen while Mrs. Matthews covers her mouth and looks at her husband, who just frowns and shakes his head. What will he do about that boy?

Boy Meets World ran out of steam towards the end, mostly because they unable to accurately portray the decadence of college life under the watchful eye of TGIF, but we grew up with these guys. We were there when Shawn learned the truth about his real mother. When Shawn’s dad died. When Shawn joined a cult. When Shawn got caught up in the Philadelphia’s illegal undergound street fighting tournaments. Jesus, Shawn was fucked up. If tragedy visited me as frequently as it visited Mr. Hunter, I too would run my fingers through my hair at every possible opportunity. I too would grow a goatee. I too woul-UNDERPANTS! Wow. That came out of nowhere. Now I can’t stop watching it. Hypnotizing.

God hates Shawn Hunter.

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Aunty.
Aunty who?
Aunty-climatic ending to this blog post

Chudsploitation: Celebrating That Which Should Absolutely Not Be Celebrated


March 10, 2008
Patrick Ripoll

Blog Cinema/Television WTF

If you own a computer and you own an internet vehicle device, and you watch movies, and you’re interested in movies, and you want to hear news and rumors about upcoming movies and you also want to hear movie people’s opinion on movies that are currently at the movies, then you should look no further than www.CHUD.com, which, IMDB and Netflix aside, is the most wonderful place for cinema on the internet machine. It’s got writers who are either intelligent, funny, assholes, a combination of all three, or Phil Owen. To be fair to Phil Owen, he’s got a more impressive head of hair than any of ‘em.

Devin, the Editor-in-Chief/Self-loathing nerd/Kubrick lookalike of CHUD.com has started a column entitled
“Chudsploitation” that I’m really really excited about, all about exploitation films. Exploitation films are films that exploit shocking or sensational content to attract audiences. They range from Shaft to Faces of Death to Meet the Spartans (which exploits the fact that Americans aren’t really picky about what movies they watch, as long as it’s not too long to make them late for something). Famous balding fugly awesome fugly director Quentin Tarantino has been a champion of them for sometime, culminating in his box-office failure/artistically dubious/undisputably awesome collaboration with Robert Rodriguez Grindhouse, in which his testicles melted off. Since then, the interest in these “grindhouse films” has boomed into an all-time slightly higher.

According to Devin, the column’s goal will be to “write about the sickest, strangest movies ever made, films with almost no redeeming value.” And when he means sick and strange, he doesn’t mean something simple like The Truth About Cats and Dogs or I Spit on Your Grave. Too easy. His first entry was on a film entitled Goodbye Uncle Tom about “An Italian documentary crew [that] goes back in time to the pre-Civil War American South to document the excesses and horrors of slavery, intercut with modern riot footage and pro-violence black power musings. In Italian.” According to Devin the film is “racist in every possible direction, brutally misogynistic and leeringly cruel”. I don’t know about you, but my ears perk up anytime the phrases “racist” and “leeringly cruel”. Must have been all those years I grew up in Texas*.

Even though Devin is a hell of a writer and entertaining as a chimp having sex with another chimp and them both having a cigarette afterwards, you don’t even have to take his word for it. Apparently the American edit** is apparently up on Youtube, in parts. I don’t know how long it will be up for, but I have a feeling that filmmakers Gualtiero Jacopetti and Franco Prosperi aren’t the type to troll Youtube to make sure their work aren’t being pirated. I know I say this all the time, but I wish NBC was more like Gualtiero Jacopetti and Franco Prosperi. Anyway, here are some links to offend you. Even if you don’t plan on watching the whole film, I’d reccomend skipping around various scenes just to learn how awful it can feel to be a member of the human race. I’d note that they aren’t safe for work, but really, they aren’t safe for anything. Shit is vile.

Addio Zio Tom (Goodbye Uncle Tom):
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8

*Texas is in close proximity to Alabama, which is where racism comes from.
**The American edit is dubbed and may have some cuts from the original Italian version. Not that it isn’t already utterly depraved, but if you’re a completist, I thought you should know.

Life Is Not A Movie… Or Maybe #1


March 8, 2008
jameseric

Cinema/Television

03.01.08 - 03.08.08

Movies I have watched:

Trust
Bonnie and Clyde
Eyes Wide Shut
The Girl From Monday
Simple Men


Welcome to the first in a weekly feature, discussing random films I’ve uncovered through the glorious creation of Netflix’s new WATCH NOW feature with over 7,000 titles you can view instantly on your PC. For those who don’t know, I used to be a film critic for a few online sites and my college newspaper. Therefore I tend to use a lot of adjectives, and use them repeatedly. I’m not a writer in the grammatically correct sense and I apologize in advance. I write in a stream-of-consciousness style with very little editing (much like I do with my music). I usually watch 5 movies a week because I’m addicted to it, and I will choose to write in detail about one. Or I will write short paragraphs for each that I watch if I feel like I have something to say about everything I watched for the week. Part One is in regards to a film that I hadn’t seen in over ten years, and now officially declare, my “favorite.” Yeah, I know. All my friends are rolling their eyes thinking “That’s his favorite for THIS week.” (Sorry Collin). I just can’t deny the excitement I get when something completely washes over me. Maybe Fearless is my favorite movie after I watch it again. But for right now, it’s Trust, directed by Hal Hartley.

There probably wouldn’t be a Juno, Chasing Amy, or Rushmore if it weren’t for the indie darlings of the 90s like filmmakers Hal Hartley, Noah Baumbach, and Jim Jarmusch. Hartley’s masterpiece, Trust, exists as a unique little motion picture encased inside a universe which manages to be both ridiculous and real at the same time. An offbeat hodgepodge that mirrors the surreal absurdity of love which, often times, dominates the structure of actual life. The most remarkable thing about this movie, though, is its ability to fill a charmingly sweet love story in the center out of what seems to be utter emptiness. It’s not very often that I think of Buster Keaton and David Mamet while watching a movie. Trust lives inside its own volcanic-sized heart, and speaks a rhythm of dialogue that influences mean-spirited critiques of a show like “Gilmore Girls,” for being too unrealistic and overtly cute for cute’s sake.

The thing is. I adore movies with a hyper-sense of reality, in which characters exchange coincidences, and talk in a language drowned in non-sequitur and random life observations. Maybe I’m envious of the people who live in the movie who can think fast, talk fast, and attempt to deconstruct their issues within 90 minutes. But Trust is one of those films where there is no sound resolution, but offers a sense of hope and possibility that can only be manifested by the redemptive promise of love. Plus it helps that the characters are flawed, three-dimensional, and constantly conflicted about their actions. I’m drawn to the ones in Trust in a way that hadn’t happened since probably Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I had seen this movie a decade ago, and only watched it this past week thanks to the new Netflix “watch now” option in which you don’t even have to wait for the movie to come in the mail.

Trust revolves around a brilliant idiot (Matthew) played by indie-stalwart Martin Donavan, and a wise-beyond-her-years teenager (Maria) played by the late great beauty Adrienne Shelley. When Maria announces her pregnancy to her parents, her father drops dead on the floor. Her mother kicks her out of the house and her boyfriend dumps her, so Maria is left alone and homeless. This is when she meets the seemingly nihilistic Matthew. Matthew is an older, educated high school graduate with a great talent for fixing electronic devices, but he can’t hang on to a job because of his principled attitude towards quality and his lack of endurance to be surrounded by capitalist automatons. When Maria accepts Matthew’s offer to help her, they begin to form a relationship with each other in which both of them begin to change, despite their imperfections. It’s hard to define it as ‘romantic’ in the same way that you can’t categorize the relationship in Lost In Translation as turning into something that’s driven by lust. It’s more revolved around two lonely souls, meeting randomly, forming a bond, and learning how to be human in an inhumane society.

While watching Trust unfold, I sat on my bed in astonishment, re-realizing that it’s simply just perfect in the way it captures my sensibilities and predilection for quirk, exaggeration, and emotionally-inconsistent individuals who try to better themselves while repeating mistakes they can’t seem to shake. I’m aware of my strange, picky sense-of-humor but there are so many moments where I’m laughing too loud, and questioning myself in the process. For instance there’s a moment towards the end involving a confrontation between Matthew and his father, and after things settle down, Maria’s mom asks “Do you want something to eat?” It’s a complete throwaway transition to the next scene, but in Hal Hartley’s world, he manages to make that line so deadpan and skillfully executed that despite its awkwardness, it’s ridiculously charming.

There’s also some sublime social commentary mixed in throughout about sex, teenage pregnancy, TV, and family relations that is cringe-worthy and honest. But if there is a flaw (and it’s not a quibble for me), it’s that Hartley’s movies tell and speak, instead of show and visualize. He has a style thats all its own, but it’s mostly carried by the screenplay rather than the directing. Kevin Smith sort of carries that same torch, but aside from Chasing Amy and Clerks 2 as being his only four star masterworks, Smith too, became somewhat lost in his own world. Hartley has made some abysmal films. The Girl From Monday is his attempt as low-fi science fiction, and it’s a chore to sit through despite the presence of Sabrina Lloyd. Flirt is arthouse pretension at its most languid. The only other times Hartley came close to replicating the genius displayed in Trust were with the spy-comedy Amateur (what if Hal Hartley made the Bourne movies?), and the struggling-writer malaise of Henry Fool (what if Hal Hartley made Adaptation and decided to throw in an homage to the toilet scene in Dumb and Dumber?). I genuinely like the majority of Hartley’s admittedly pretentious films, but you have to prepare for a period of adjustment while watching them in the same way you have to with David Mamet. It’s sooo stylized that it can be off-putting, but the rewards are plentiful if you can stomach the quirkiness. Trust is one of those rare movies that makes you see yourself and the world outside in a whole different light. It makes you cautious and hopeful for the future (especially if you’re single - have a lot of quirks - and tend to think that no one will put up with you). I think in the end, there’s a line in the film that sums up the hyper-surreal soap opera world of these characters: “Family is like a gun, point in the wrong direction, and someone gets hurt.” I could go on and on about why Trust has become my favorite movie as of 2008, but I need to curb my hyperboles. Stay tuned for more “Life Is Not A Movie… Or Maybe” articles. I am mostly revisiting movies that I haven’t watched in years, to see if my viewpoint has changed since I’ve grown up a bit. Trust is the perfect starting point for this project, and reaffirms that I will remain a cinemaniac til I’m six feet underground.

A great scene from TRUST, and the movie can also be viewed in its entirety on YouTube! If this scene isn’t your cup of tea, then you probably won’t like the movie as a whole:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQI10Njy7zI

Mystery Science Theater 3000: Best Television Show Idea in the History of Television Show Ideas


March 6, 2008
Patrick Ripoll

Cinema/Television

No words needed. Also, I’m lazy. Anyway, here ya go (I’d embed them as videos, but it’s not letting me. If anyone on the Blog staff can fix this, let me know):

MST3K short - Posture Pals
MST3K short - What To Do on a Date
MST3K short - Spring Fever
MST3K - A Patrick Swayze Christmas
MST3K short - Here Comes the Circus
MST3K short - A Day at the Fair
MST3K short - Johnny at the Fair
MST3K “Best Of” Montage - The Final Sacrifice
MST3K “Best Of” Montage - Werewolf
MST3K “Best Of” Montage - Santa Claus
MST3K “Best Of” Montage - Devil Fish
MST3K “Best Of” Montage - Overdrawn at the Memory Bank
MST3K “Best Of” Montage - Time Chasers
MST3K - Squirm part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10

Enjoy this.

The songs that made Juno what it is


February 17, 2008
rhiannon

Cinema/Television

Seeing as it came out in December, I suspect that most of you reading this in America have already seen ‘Juno’. Well, after months (probably about 6) months of anticipation, it finally hit the cinemas here in February. Considering the length of time it’s been floating around in your parts, I intend not to write a film review, but more of a music-in-the-film review. Firstly, it’s fair to say that I am a HUGE Kimya Dawson fan. In the 4 or so years that I’ve listened to her music, it’s affected my life in more ways than I can count. Saying that, it was a very odd experience to hear her songs (notably Tireswing, So Nice, So Smart, My Rollercoaster *WITHOUT THE LYRICS*, Loose Lips *ditto, I believe*, and Sleep) booming out of the big screen speakers into the massive audience. Although there’s always the fear something could happen to my precious music, I found that it was played at exactly the right points to fit the film, and really added a lot to it in terms of continuity and all round cuteness. Of course these were not Kimya’s only contributions to the film.Photobucket As well as a couple of Antsy Pants song (a band Kimya is in with some friends, they sing very cute kid songs and generally rock the fuck out), including the fabulous Vampire closing the credits, the moldy peaches’ contribution was super important. The use of Anyone Else But You (what I believe to be one of the greatest love songs I have ever owned) really took the film, and relationship of Juno and the delectable Bleeker, up about a million levels. As one of my favourite things about the Moldy Peaches was their ability to split the vocals 50/50, dish them out, and bring them back together to make a song so tight and so romantic that I want to cry when I sing it. I rarely do though, because I smile so much. Anyway…. it really worked. Photobucket As well as pumping in my favourite duo and my favourite singer (apart from Jeffrey Lewis) to an insane degree, the soundtrack also features some of my other favourite bands, Belle and Sebastian and the Velvet Underground. The thing about the Velvet Underground is that they can have songs with 18 minutes of feedback solo (see Sister Ray) or they can flip right round to perfect little pop songs that almost out-twee Belle and Sebastian. Obviously here, they plumped for the latter with I’m Sticking With You. Belle and Sebastian offered two songs to the film, Expectations (ironic as it is, not actually about pregnancy, despite the misleading name) and Piazza, New York Catcher slotted in rather nicely and made me incredibly happy. If you haven’t seen this film, I don’t want to give too much away, but at the distressing climax of this film a song is played that literally broke my heart in two. It was a song that I am slightly ashamed to say I hadn’t heard before. That song is Cat Power’s Sea of Love. Taken from her covers album, it’s literally in the top 10 most depressing/beautiful songs I have ever heard. The thing about it is (similarly to her amazing cover of the Velvet Underground’s I Found A Reason), the lyrics profess love, and can definitely be read as a song of love, rather than heartbreak. Somehow she has the ability to completely mutate this. I don’t know how she does it, but it’s wonderful. All in all, great film (getting amazing reviews from everyone here, sort of freaking me out), even better music, and Michael Cera. What more do you need? (PS- Paragraphs stopped working for me half way through this post, sorry)

Superbad = Supergood


February 3, 2008
rhiannon

Cinema/Television

Ok, so, confession time. I’ve been incredibly busy of late with various deadlines coming and going and then coming back with a vengeance. Basically, I’m sorry for not posting  a blog last week, I am a terrible person who is easily overcome by the perils of college work.That being said, this week I found the time to watch the immensely funny Superbad. Though I am sure the majority of you reading this will have already seen it, it just came to DVD in the UK, and being too busy to go to the cinema, it was a very big deal for me and my friends.Starring Jonah Hill and the infinite hotness that is Michael Cera as the chief protagonists, the plot is centred around their  quest to get the booze to the party and bed the girls of their dreams. After asking a friend of mine whether she’d seen it she squealed in horror at the misogyny and crudeness involved. I was pretty shocked at this as I hadn’t really considered any kind of sexist message underlying the hectic plot. After some deliberation, I concluded that this was not the case. It’s funny, it’s well written, well shot, and ultimately delivers the right message: If you plan on getting a girl drunk to sleep with her, it won’t work, so just be a good guy and all the other crap will sort itself out. That’s my kind of film.   Set in a Ulysses-style 24 hour period, we see Seth, Evan and their insanely squeaky friend Fogell (eg- McLovin) they flee from parties, flee from policemen (who also have a pretty significant role in the film, but I don’t have time to get into that now) and  discover the true nature of their friendship. Ta daaaaaa! Photobucket I’m still not very good at this fomatting lark.   

New To Theatres: 1/18/08


January 18, 2008
Patrick Ripoll

Cinema/Television

In my first post I was quite gung ho about doing an article every Friday until I died. 2 weeks later I missed an article because I was working as key grip on a music video. I’d apologize, but I doubt anyone really cared. Like I said 2 weeks ago, January is a graveyard and did anyone really want to hear what I had to say about a fucking Veggie-Tales movie? I will say that I’ll eventually catch First Sunday on video, but that’s more for my love of Kat Williams (who IS a hysterical comedian who is smarter than most people give him credit for) than my love of Tyler Perry-esque chitlin’ plays.

CONTEST: This article needs a name. You could be the lucky person to name it! Whoever wins will receive a Patrick Ripoll prize-pack which includes some DVD’s, some mixtapes, maybe some candy, all sorts of glorious shit. So get naming! All entries can be left in the form of a comment on the blog, e-mailed to me at soybomb@care2.com, AIMed to me at soybomb43, or sent as a private message on the Collective forums. Whatever it takes to get it to me.

A quick word on the Golden Globes: No one gives a fuck about the Golden Globes.

And now, onto this Friday, or as Hollywood would like to call it, “The Official Start of the New Year”. We got the much-hyped about Blair-Witch meets Gamera “Cloverfield”, a new Woody Allen movie(!!!!), some generic looking romantic comedy featuring the star of the best romantic comedy of last year, a low-profile Diane Keaton/Queen Latifah caper, and a movie about a girl who’s vagina eats things AKA Patrick Ripoll’s favorite movie of all time, ever.

Let do this like nudists!

Cloverfield (Trailer)
Starring Mike Vogel, Jessica Lucas, and the fucking singer from Yellowcard
Directed by Matt Reeves
This sure as hell better be better than the 1998 Godzilla
The Premise: Monster(s?) battling in New York City, as captured by a 20-something with a camcorder.

The Lowdown: Ever since the teaser trailer hit last summer the internet has gone crazy with speculation. Thanks to clever viral marketing by Mr. J.J. Abrhams, that buzz has nearly lasted all the way til now. Will the movie live up to the hype? It’s an intriquing premise that could be great or shit, but fortunately the early word coming in has been almost unanimously positive. Nothing earth shattering, but all involved seem to agree that at worst, it’s a very entertaining film.

Is It Worth Seeing?: For a brief (75 minutes!) good city-stomping time at the theatres, this is a safe bet.

27 Dresses (Trailer)
Starring Katherine Heigl, James Marsden, Judy Greer
Directed by Anne Fletcher

The Premise:  After being a Bridesmaid 20-something times (I forget the exact number) Katherine Heigl fights to win back the man she loves from her sister.

The Lowdown: Katherine Heigl may feel that Knocked Up was sexist, but if I were her, I’d be more concerned about not knocking the best film I’ll probably ever be in. Especially if she’s going to appear in middling garbage like this. Besides, what’s a more sexist trait of the romantic comedy than the persistant idea that there is no greater prize for a woman than to win a handsome and successful man to marry? And while I don’t believe that Knocked Up is sexist (then again, I’m one of the few people who really felt for Leslie Mann’s character and didn’t think she was a shrew bitch), Judd Apatow’s crew is certainly a boy’s club, so it’s not likely that Heigl will ever be in a movie as funny and heart-felt as Knocked Up again. On the plus side, at least she probably won’t ever have to have a sex scene with someone who looks like Rogen again. So maybe it’s not all bad for her.

Is It Worth Seeing?: Let’s not kid ourselves, there are those of you who have girlfriends, wives, or very clingy mothers who aren’t going to want to see a docu-drama about giant monsters decapitating Lady Liberty. So, for some of you out there, it’s not going to be a choice. You’re going to see this flick whether you want to or not. At least take comfort in the fact that the very lovely and funny Judy Greer has a supporting role, which should make it a bit less painful.

Mad Money (Trailer)
Starring Diane Keaton, Queen Latifah, Katie Holmes, and Ted Danson
Directed by Callie Khouri
If The Coens couldn't pull it off...

The Premise: Diane Keaton, Queen Latifah and Katie Holmes try to rob a bank but strike COMIC GOLD INSTEAD! GABBA GABBA HEY!

The Lowdown: Against my better judgment, I am damned proud of Diane Keaton. There was a point where she had the potential to be one of the all-time great comediennes, right up there with Lucile Balle and Gilda Radner. However, Love & Death (the most underrated comedy of all time) was a long long time ago and her career path didn’t quite go that way. But flash forward to now, and you see that she’s done alright for herself. Through some clever career moves, she’s established a niche for herself as “the hot funny old lady” that should keep her working until her teeth fall out. And while the films she’s in are far from great (though I do have a soft spot for The Family Stone), it’s not often an actress is able to stay relevant in Hollywood once menopause sets in. Hollywood is kind of cruel that way.

So good for you, Diane Keaton. Even though the movies you have been in have been shit (Because I Said So being a particularly big offender), you stay on top. Of course, being dumped in the middle of January against Katherine Heigl and giant monsters with little advertising support isn’t exactly “on top”, but at least you’re doing better than Mia Farrow! Congrats!

Is It Worth Seeing?: Listen, if the goddamned Coen Brothers already made this exact movie (Ladykillers, anyone?) and it wasn’t worth seeing then, there’s no fucking way the director of The Ya-Ya Sisterhood is going to be anything better than shit.

Cassandra’s Dream (Trailer)
Starring Collin Farrell, Ewan McGregor, Phil Davis, Tom Wilkinson
Directed by Woody Allen
Woody Allen returns, hardcore.

The Premise: Ewan McGregor and Collin Farrell are in over their heads in debt, and get entangled in a dangerous and sinister series of events to clear it.

The Lowdown: Woody Allen is awesome. I need to make that clear as possible because it’s easy to forget how good he is. Match Point helped people remember that he can still turn out a killer movie, but it’s important to realise that Match Point was no fluke. Woody Allen is up there with Scorsese as one of America’s greatest living and working filmmakers, and the fact that every movie he releases isn’t an event (even the bad ones, like Anything Else or Hollywood Ending) is a real shame. His last film, Scoop, was a light comedy (reportedly) designed solely to show off the comedic acting chops of Scarlett Johanson, and while it was funny, it was a mere appetizer for Cassandra’s Dream, which is the kind of film Woody should be focusing on now. It’s being dumped at the beginning of the year because the Oscar race is already too crowded and this film doesn’t have the benefit of surprise that Match Point did, but Allen was never one to court awards anyway. So this isn’t going to be pushed and promoted as the important movie it is, but don’t be fooled, this is just as important to see as Atonement (and probably more so).

Is It Worth Seeing?: You bet your ass it is. It’s still in limited release, but look for it when it goes wider.

Teeth (Trailer)
Starring Jess Weixler, John Hensley, Josh Pais
Directed by Mitchell Lichtenstein
New meaning to the phrase

The Premise: Jess Weixler’s vagina has teeth and is hungry. I’m not shitting you.

The Lowdown: Why is this not already an established genre? Why is there not a “vagina dentata” section at my local Best Buy? I don’t need to know any more about this movie to know it’s going down as one of the all time greatest movies since Nashville. This girl’s hairy scar has teeth! Her cootch! Teeth! Do I need to spell it out for you??

Ok, let me calm down a second. Suffice to say, this kind of premise alone sells me on a movie. Whether this film is a cheap tawdry monster movie, a romantic comedy, a documentary filmed in real-time, it doesn’t matter. The premise alone already has my ticket. But, as if you needed any more reason to see this film, it’s also supposed to be hilarious, terrifying, daring, and disgusting. Also, Jess Weixler’s performance evidentally sells the whole thing. So on top of a great premise worthy of early Cronenberg, it’s supposedly all pulled off well too.

Not that it should matter. Chick’s pussy is hungry, s’all I’m sayin’. If you aren’t the kind of person who gets excited about a movie like this, you aren’t the kind of person who gets to be my friend.

Is It Worth Seeing?: I don’t care how far away from you this film is playing, see this shit. There’s no bonding experience like going on a 5 hour road trip with your fam to see a movie bout a girl who’s snatch devours shit.

This week kicks off another exciting year in film, and I for one, can’t wait for what ‘08 has in store for us. Next week has Sylvester Stallone (or as I like to call him, ”the male Diane Keaton”) becoming Rambo again and kicking all sorts of ass. Then again, there’s also another shitty dance movie that defies all grammatical logic, “How She Move”. So maybe it won’t be such a great year after all. Who knows.

Yann Tiersen- Le Fabuleux Destin d’Amelie Poulain


January 13, 2008
rhiannon

Cinema/Television

In my dismal quest to complete all my college work before the end of the Christmas holidays I found myself reading Shakespeare’s Measure For Measure alone in my bed, feeling a little lonesome. Due to my inability to take in any information whilst decent music is playing I often find myself having to choose between keeping up with my work and playing some kickin’ choons. Then the solution hit me: INSTRUMENTALS! I found the key to this to be Yann Tieren’s soundtrack to the popular flick Amelie (Le Fabuleux Destin d’Amelie Poulain), and even though I’ve seen the film a number of times before and have come over the songs themselves, I still felt totally shocked about the absolute greatness of it. My favourite track, Le Deux Pianos is a delightfully twinkly piano duet (as the name would suggest) that badly makes me want to practice my piano a lot more and get beyond grade 2.

After consulting my French-studying sister over the translations of the titles we noticed that a running theme of the soundtrack is a waltz. They pop up all over the place, played on an array of instruments including pianos, strings and accordions. Sometimes the music feels really simple and traditional for about a minute, but it almost always steps up into something totally unreserved and becomes this big French orchestra freak out. Wonderful, wonderful stuff.

Photobucket

Sounding original, kitsch, cute and more than a little funky, if I was granted a soundtrack to my life I would definitely want it to be this.

 

I’m sorry I can’t find a URL this time. Have a pleasant week.